Ryan Serhant, the charismatic star of Bravo’s “Million Dollar Listing New York” and a titan in the competitive world of New York real estate, commanded a significant presence at Barnes & Noble-Lincoln Park in Dallas. While the successful broker now effortlessly draws throngs of admirers, Serhant candidly shared a surprising truth about his career trajectory: his initial three years in real estate were, in his own words, an immense struggle. This raw honesty resonated deeply with the audience, offering a refreshing contrast to the often-glamorized depictions of wealth and success.
Addressing the enthusiastic crowd who came to hear him discuss his bestselling book, “Sell It Like Serhant,” Serhant didn’t hold back on the difficulties he encountered. “This business is so hard,” he declared, emphasizing the steep learning curve and relentless effort required. “I didn’t make any money the first three years. It sucked.” This powerful admission served as a foundational message for the aspiring entrepreneurs and real estate professionals in attendance, setting realistic expectations and highlighting the importance of resilience in the face of adversity. His transparent account underlined that even the most successful individuals begin their journey with significant challenges.
Later in the afternoon, during a Q&A session, an audience member announced his impending college graduation and his intention to enter the real estate sector. Serhant seized this opportunity to impart invaluable advice, preparing the young man for the demanding road ahead. He urged him to mentally reframe the initial period of his career: “The first three years after undergrad, that should be grad school in your head.” This powerful analogy suggests that the early stages of a career are less about immediate financial gain and more about intensive learning, skill development, and building a robust professional foundation.
Serhant elaborated on this critical mindset, advising, “Set the expectation that you will make zero dollars for three years.” He continued, “Anything you make is because you’re doing a good job.” This guidance is designed not to discourage, but to empower. By understanding and embracing this “grad school” mentality, new entrants can focus on mastering their craft, nurturing client relationships, and developing sustainable business practices without the pressure of instant financial success. It’s a strategy for long-term growth, encouraging dedication and strategic effort over quick returns, and preparing individuals for the inherent volatility of the real sales cycle.
One of the driving forces behind Serhant’s decision to write his book was a distinct desire to differentiate it from the myriad of self-help books and superficial celebrity memoirs. “I didn’t want to write a fluffy reality television book,” he asserted, highlighting his commitment to providing genuine, actionable strategies for sales professionals. His aim was to create a practical guide rooted in his firsthand experiences and the concrete methodologies that propelled him from struggle to unparalleled success in the demanding New York real estate market. “Sell It Like Serhant” is intended to be a robust resource, offering authentic, hard-won insights rather than generic motivational platitudes.
With a mischievous grin and a perfectly timed pause, Serhant added, “There are other people that do that,” then quipped, “maybe even somebody on my show.” This lighthearted jest underscored his belief in providing tangible value and avoiding the often-superficial narratives prevalent in some entertainment-driven content. His book focuses on equipping readers with the mindset and tactical approaches necessary for real-world sales environments, ensuring that the advice is both profound and practical. It’s a testament to his dedication to empowering others with truly effective strategies for achieving sales excellence.
Interestingly, Serhant admits that his initial move to New York was not driven by aspirations of becoming a real estate magnate. His primary goal was to pursue an acting career, a path he actively followed for a period. He even secured a role as Evan Walsh on the popular CBS soap opera “The Young and the Restless.” However, his acting ambitions were curtailed when, as he humorously recalled, “they killed me off.” This early professional setback, though disappointing at the time, ironically proved to be a pivotal moment, forcing him to pivot and explore alternative avenues, ultimately leading him to the path of real estate.
After his acting career concluded, Serhant dedicated himself to the demanding New York grind, famously stating that he “worked my ass off.” This period included an unexpected stint as a hand model, a quirky detail that further illustrates his diverse background and relentless pursuit of income. His eventual decision to enter real estate coincided with one of the most tumultuous periods in recent economic history: his very first day in the business was the same day Lehman Brothers collapsed, marking the dramatic onset of the Great Recession. This baptism by fire instilled in him a profound sense of resilience, adaptability, and an unparalleled work ethic, proving that success can be forged even in the most challenging environments.
Even before his foray into real estate, Serhant had already established a formidable work ethic, a discipline that became the bedrock of his extraordinary success. He firmly believes that while external circumstances—like market crashes or economic downturns—are often beyond our control, our internal response and commitment to discipline remain entirely within our power. “There is so much that is completely out of your control,” he acknowledged, highlighting the unpredictable nature of business. Yet, he offered a powerful counter-narrative, asserting that through consistent discipline, individuals can actively cultivate an environment where success becomes not just possible, but probable, regardless of external turbulence.
“It comes down to discipline,” he reiterated, underscoring this principle as the single most critical factor in achieving lasting success. For Serhant, discipline is more than just working hard; it encompasses strategic planning, methodical execution, and unwavering consistency in daily activities. It involves setting clear goals, adhering to a structured routine, and relentlessly pursuing opportunities. This internal fortitude allows him and his team to navigate complex deals, manage high-stakes situations, and maintain momentum even when faced with market shifts or unforeseen obstacles, solidifying his reputation as a master of execution.
This unwavering commitment to discipline and meticulous organization ultimately provides the essential framework that enables any sales professional not only to serve existing clients effectively but also to relentlessly pursue and generate new business. Serhant champions a proactive approach, emphasizing that true sales mastery involves a systematic method for cultivating both current relationships and future opportunities. It ensures a sustainable growth model, preventing reliance on a finite pool of clients and fostering a continuous influx of potential leads, a crucial element for long-term career viability and expansion in any competitive industry.
“Being a great salesperson is somebody who can generate new leads and new business,” Serhant explained with clarity, distilling a complex concept into an actionable insight. This proactive stance is fundamental to his sales philosophy, moving beyond merely closing deals to actively creating opportunities. He stressed the continuous nature of this effort: “You have to be able to generate new leads every day.” This daily commitment to lead generation is not just a recommendation but a core requirement for sustained growth and relevance in any sales-driven profession, ensuring a healthy pipeline of potential clients and continuous expansion.
In his latest Bravo show, also titled “Sell It By Serhant,” he extends his mentorship to individuals and teams, helping them sharpen their sales techniques. Through this immersive coaching, Serhant has gained profound insights into prevalent mistakes that commonly hinder sales professionals. A significant observation he shared was the instant transformation many people undergo when interacting with a potential client: “The biggest mistake I saw was the minute a potential customer would come to them, they’d go from normal person to salesperson.” This abrupt shift, he noted, often creates an immediate barrier, making genuine connection challenging.
“The worst thing you can do is try to make someone a customer and a client,” he further elaborated, cautioning against an overly aggressive or transactional mindset. Serhant advocates for a more organic, human-centered approach to sales, famously encapsulated in his analogy: “Selling is just dating.” This perspective encourages patience, authenticity, and relationship-building, recognizing that trust and rapport are far more effective in securing long-term business than a pushy, immediate sales pitch. It’s about understanding needs and building genuine connections before attempting to close a deal.
To highlight the absurdity of an immediate sales approach, Serhant humorously illustrated, “You don’t go to a bar, tap someone on the shoulder, and say, ‘Can I help you with something? Do you need anything? I’ll be right over there if you do.’” As the audience chuckled in recognition of the awkward scenario, he concluded simply, “That would be weird.” This vivid imagery perfectly conveyed his message: sales, like dating, thrives on genuine interaction, active listening, and the gradual building of trust. It’s a powerful lesson in human psychology applied directly to business, fostering an environment of comfort and open communication.
Instead, Serhant passionately advocates for organically cultivating relationships that naturally evolve into repeat customers and valuable referral networks. This approach transcends single transactions, aiming for long-term partnerships built on mutual respect and understanding. By consistently providing value, acting as a trusted advisor, and prioritizing client needs over immediate gains, sales professionals can foster deep loyalty. This not only ensures sustained business growth but also strengthens one’s reputation as an ethical and reliable expert, creating a self-perpetuating cycle of success and client satisfaction.
During the engaging Q&A segment, Serhant took several thoughtful questions from the audience, offering practical insights on topics ranging from orchestrating successful open houses to strategically leveraging resources for team expansion. His responses were consistently insightful, drawing from his vast experience and delivered with the same directness and enthusiasm that characterizes his book and television presence. Each answer provided actionable takeaways, reinforcing his commitment to empowering others with the tangible knowledge needed to thrive in the demanding real estate and sales landscapes.
Much to the amusement of the crowd, Serhant also shared an entertaining anecdote about the original, rather unconventional, title for his book. “‘Sell It Like Serhant’ was not the original title,” he revealed, pausing for dramatic effect. “The original title was ‘Balls Up,’” he explained, eliciting widespread giggles from the audience. While his publisher, Hachette, was undoubtedly enthusiastic about the book’s content and potential, they gently, but firmly, advised against the chosen title during their very first meeting. This behind-the-scenes story added a personal, humorous touch, humanizing the publishing process.
He further elaborated on the true meaning behind his original title: “I talk a lot throughout the book about having balls in the air.” He quickly clarified, “I talk about balls a lot in the book — not like testicles, but like balls in the air.” This playful explanation underscored his philosophy of managing multiple projects, tasks, and life events simultaneously—a metaphor for multitasking and navigating complex challenges with agility. The revised title, while perhaps less provocative, ultimately captures the essence of his practical, results-oriented sales methodology and his ability to excel across diverse ventures.
Indeed, with multiple successful TV shows, a bestselling book, a new baby on the way, and an extensive book tour, Ryan Serhant unequivocally stands as a master at keeping all those “balls in the air.” His remarkable journey from struggling aspiring actor to a prominent real estate mogul and influential media personality serves as a potent testament to the principles of discipline, unrelenting resilience, and authentic relationship-building that he passionately advocates. Serhant continues to inspire countless individuals to embrace challenges, learn from every setback, and relentlessly pursue their ambitious goals, proving that with strategic effort and an indomitable spirit, anything is truly within reach.
@ryanserhant Was great to hear you speak today and being a motivation to balance that seesaw! Balls Up… PA. Dude love the shoes!#sellitlikeserhant #ryanserhant #milliondollarlisting… https://t.co/dgOekplVNX
— Jason Northcutt (@NorthREGroup) September 23, 2018
Awesome advice today. You are very inspiring and it was a pleasure meeting you! @RyanSerhant pic.twitter.com/pBf2Uib5QW
— Natalie Brewer (@NatalieBrewer4) September 22, 2018
@RyanSerhant it was SO nice to meet you in Dallas today! You have some really great tips. pic.twitter.com/txa05e6wVz
— Lisa Wagner (@lisasteele47) September 22, 2018
Been following @ryanserhant since milliondollarlistingny! Finally got to meet him in person, shake his hand, and told him what an amazing job he did with his marriage proposal to the love… https://t.co/6r4Hk2WYVl
— Jon L. Culpepper (@JONLECULPEPPER) September 22, 2018
@RyanSerhant Thank You pic.twitter.com/z3sfCZK7Gb
— J.D. Wealth (@jdwealthy) September 22, 2018
Thanks for being such an inspiration in my life @RyanSerhant 😃😃😃 #dallas #booksigning #motivation #dallasrealtors pic.twitter.com/AKzjoOzdaO
— Alex Prins (@alexprinsrealty) September 22, 2018